I Hid This Until Now…
Last night I had an encounter with Jesus and unlike the others before, this one was something I did not wake up happy about. There is something that He wanted me to speak about, and He said that it would “ruffle the feathers” of those who were with religious mindsets, greed, selfishness, and who had idols of money.
He even showed me some of their feelings towards me after I published this, and it made me not want to share anything at all, LOL. Yet that is between them and God. Their opinion of me is not my business. However, God saved my life. We could have starved or could have been homeless so many times over these years….but Jesus saved us. I owe Him my life.
Jesus was also telling me that He wanted to wash the “religious dust” out of the church and make some changes….big changes.
There is something that I have held inside for many years. Long before God took me on this journey of living by His promise of support, I had an encounter with Him that was beyond amazing and also very powerful.
His presence was so concentrated with love that it made me so thirsty for more and more and more. While I was obsessing over this love that I was so dehydrated for, He started to tell me about my mission ahead.
He showed me that I would be going through a lowly time, and it would also be a testing of hearts. He showed me how many have become “hard-hearted” with greed, and they would not give because of their idolatry and selfishness or critical judgements.
Not only that, but Jesus said that many in the church believe that they are saved, but they are not. He said that many believe they are His friends, but are not.
That is because when He was hungry, they did not give Him food. When He was thirsty, they did not give Him water. When He was cold, they did not give Him shelter or clothes.
As He was talking, living water filled my mouth and I went to talk and waters of His presence was pouring out of my mouth. It was the most peculiar and incredible encounter ever!
After the encounter, I buried it deep down, and I had NO intention of ever speaking of it because I did not want to be the next victim of religious accusations and abuse.
Many years went by, and I had to endure the near-death experiences of needing shelter, food, and water. There were some who would show me the real love of Jesus and send us some love support for a meal or help with a hotel.
But there were others who would say nothing at all or just say “I’m praying”…ugh. That “I’m praying” seemed like such an insult when it came from those who could help but did not want to give a hand…whether that is from their religious judgement or greed…only God knows.
I had a lady the other day write this very outwardly loud prayer for people to help us to have food and shelter, and I could feel God’s heart about it…it was not good. It was like she was making a clown out of herself…because never once in all these years did she even offer a dollar towards food or water or refuge, and she was very much able.
After she posted her very obnoxious prayer, I felt like she had punched me in the chest. She wasn’t my friend….a friend is someone who helps. This woman watched me sobbing from a Walmart parking lot with no food and no place to find refuge…and she turned the other cheek….while posting about her love for GOD…(shaking my head)…..
A real friend is someone who loves without conditions, and who loves others AS MUCH or MORE than they love themselves. That is the second most important thing after loving God with all your heart….to love others AS you love yourself.
When she did that, I felt like Jesus saying, “get away from me, I never knew you at all”. As she watched me suffer, she indulged in her own greed. I would never do that to a friend…. I have never been more passionate about helping the needy since I have walked where Jesus has led me through the lowest of the lows.
“For I was starving, and you left Me with no food. When I was dry and thirsty, you left Me to struggle with nothing to drink” Mathew 25:42
I will repeat myself, I don’t want to share this. These are the things that only God knows….but last night He said…SHARE IT. He wanted me to be completely open and transparent. As I write this out, I feel like I am digging my own grave, haha. Good thing I am a big fan of solitude 🙂
But I owe Jesus my life and if He wants to flush out the religious greed from the church…then I am all for it.
When Jesus said, “I was hungry, but you didn’t give me food”… He was referring to those who refuse to help their “brothers or sisters” in Christ who are in need. Please know that I am not just referring to myself. There are people in need all over, and they are being ignored and judged unfairly.
“ I tell you this: whenever you saw a brother hungry or cold, when you saw a sister weak and without friends, when you saw the least of these and ignored their suffering, so you ignored Me” Mathew 25:45
I am very sad for those who believe they are saved but like Jesus said…they are not.
I don’t look to others to hold us up on this very strange and much too long (my personal opinion LOL) of a journey… I look to God. However, God has had us receive from the love support of others, and I am praying that God repays you all super abundantly.
But I always put my focus on Jesus, because when He said in Hebrews 13 to not make idols out of money and to not be greedy, He was saying to look to HIM. An abundance is the PROMISE. He promises MORE THAN ENOUGH. God says in that same scripture that He is able to supply everything we need!
“ Let your character [your moral essence, your inner nature] be free from the love of money [shun greed—be financially ethical], being content with what you have; for He has said,
“I will never [under any circumstances] desert you [nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless], nor will I forsake or let you down or relax My hold on you [assuredly not]!” Hebrews 13:5
I have read that the poor are the most generous of all, and I believe that 100%. Because they have empathy and compassion. They understand. If God had not taken me down this dirt road of lowliness, I would not have His heart when He gives me millions and millions.
Now I have plans to build ranch homes for the homeless, and I am passionate to help those who need real comfort. I heard a quote from a famous preacher once, and He said that when you meet someone who is starving from needing food…you give them food and water…not an empty promise for a greed or judgement filled prayer. LOVE IS AN ACTION.
I believe in prayers and I spend most of my days praying. I am actually writing a book about prayer at this moment. What is at the center of the heart is what matters.
But I also believe that if you have the ability to help someone…anyone….with any kind of need….then help them and trust God to repay you. That will cause even more blessings to come back to you. Plus, you never know when Jesus could be using that moment to test your heart.
Having to go through this journey in such a way is so hard. It is ALL obedience and discomfort, because I would much rather get a normal job than have to be an outcast to man. When I agreed to share this with Jesus, I also accepted that I may be all alone after that. Yet, when God is on your side….who can stand against you? No one….
To whoever is left….thank you for the love. ❤️
I love you.